Friends

"Henry! Not The Alcohol Again!!"

   Alcohol, sometimes known as the Irish, is quite a tricky liquid that tends to gets people in more trouble than it could possibly be worth. What a better way than to slowly poison yourself from years of drinking fermented sugars. I could really care less what alcohol does to individuals, what’s valuable is what happens when an intoxicated individual + public = not the best of memories.  A single weekend can’t even come and go without some idiot getting wasted, jumping in a vehicle and then managing to smash into some unlucky family’s caravan on the highway. If the Taliban terrorists wanted to actually do some REAL damage, they could promote drinking and driving to all the gullible morons.

Now, if you’re wanting to sit back and have something to ease the stress of the day, or to pass a little boredom without actually having to kill yourself or others that happen to cross your path – Marijuana is a great substitute to alcohol. Other, more familiar names might include, weed, pot, refer, her greenness, devil’s lettuce, etc, etc.  Oh! Sorry mom, but “dope” isn’t an appropriate name for MJ anymore.  Moreover, you don’t even have to smoke weed anymore (as opposed to fifty years ago). Now you can use simple devices that vaporize the plant, rendering harmful substances useless.  





     A lot of people don’t seem to have a problem with alcohol itself, more the people who abuse it and act like a fool while drinking. This isn’t a good reason at all, people are stupid, not the drink they overindulge in. This is like saying a gun is responsible for killing someone, you can’t blame the tool used to perform an action, only the user is responsible. Of course people use alcohol irresponsibly, obviously Uncle Jimmy who shows up to the family bbq “smelling like tinkle” and trying to hit on his cousin has a problem. This is far from the rule however.

With all of the overstated negative health effects that the anti-fun lobby likes to espouse, you would think that all alcoholic drinks are basically poison that will kill you within minutes of ingesting. Every statistic or side-effect they put out there are in relation to binge-drinkers, moderate drinkers actually enjoy quite a few positive effects on their health. Raised HDL levels, reduced risk of heart disease, and reduced inflammation and risk of blood clots.


Don’t let Mark fool you, he’s only ranting against alcohol because he’s a lightweight who can’t hang with the big boys. He’s still stuck in the “legalize weed” phase, which I’m all for in principle, but seriously...there comes a point when it’s time to grow up and learn to simply appreciate a good scotch.